I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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