I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I showed him my bush... on skype.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
