well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
