I seem to have left my pride at pride
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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