I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I'm both gender and math confused
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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