I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
