If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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