What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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