I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
