How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
