The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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