Those balls look pretty dangerous.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
