I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
high people should be assigned attendants
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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