you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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