Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
My Higher Power is John Stamos
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
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