So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
