Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Randomize
