If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
