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Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
