you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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