i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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