woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize