Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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