You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize