it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
