I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
It's like God shit irony all over that family
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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