STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
