So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize