oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
