Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
