Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
