yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
