How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
