A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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