If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
