Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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