Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
She said her name was "party"
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
My ass is underappreciated
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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