do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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