Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
