All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
