butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
