so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
