# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Randomize
