There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize