Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
