my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
You've changed since you got that strap on
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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