Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
