oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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