I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
50% drunk capacity currently
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
