Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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