just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
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Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
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BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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